The Analogy of Time

By Susan Rowlen


There are various reasons how people react to time. For some, as people are facing their end they would give anything to have more time to stay in this world. For others, they understand their end is near, and make their peace.

Time is a funny thing, how people embrace the events that surround them is truly a personal decision. You can have an extraordinary wish to something you want to happen, and it can be the biggest misunderstanding at the same time when it does not happen.


So why exactly is TIME so important???


As I have grown older, time has taught me not to question but to trust. Trust that time truly has its own agenda, and it’s not for us to compete with. So, the next time you question the timing to things, or your patience is running thin in regards to your wishes, your hopes, and dreams, that have not materialized yet… Remember there is a plan, it comes when you are truly ready.

When you begin to lose track of the time, is when time becomes your friend. You will feel the need to explore, to be happy in the moment, and to trust in the universe that it’s all in the timing without wanting and waiting.

The true tragedy is waiting for what you want to happen, and living an unlived life in the process. As the old saying goes… “You are not too old, and it’s not too late”

Trust, Relax, and Live without Waiting!

There is a lot of mystery about the process of loved ones crossing over to the other side. I’m often asked the question, “Is my loved one here and was my loved one happy with the wake or memorial service?” Let me explain just what happens when our loved one passes. First and foremost, our loved ones do not cross into the light until a few days after the burial or memorial service. From the time of the memorial service, the spirit has 72 hours when they can cross into the light. The only exception is when small children and babies pass they are escorted straight into the light by their angels. They don’t wait around. Almost always our loved ones want to attend their wake, funeral or memorial service.

When I go to a wake I always see the deceased laid out with their head to the left and their feet to the right. The deceased is at the foot of the casket because they can hear all the mourners talking and making their comments. They also want to inspect how they look and what they are wearing. They also want to hear and see everything that is going on around them. They are always surprised to know that I see them but if it is someone I know personally they appear to me soon after crossing over and are so happy to see that I came to their wake.

Female spirits usually are nosey and want to hear what everyone is saying around them. The male spirits usually are walking around the funeral home and checking everything out. If someone is cremated they still attend their memorial service. I can remember my daughter and I went to the wake of the mother of her dear friend. As we approached the casket, we saw how pretty she was made up with a mauve colored dress with lace sleeves. I commented to the mother’s daughter how lovely her mother looked and how pretty her dress was. All of a sudden, her mother jumped up in front of me and said, “Yes, the dress is pretty, but the sleeves pinch and if you think I’m going through eternity wearing this dress that pinches, you got another thing coming!” Sometime later I told that story to her daughter and her daughter replied, “You know, when I picked out that dress I knew my mom would never wear it because the sleeves pinched. So I can see her saying this to you.” And then she started laughing with me. I also told her that her mother was so proud and happy how she arranged everything and how proud she was of her. That made her daughter so happy and at peace.

It is also very important to know what your loved ones wishes are because it is important to carry out their wishes. After crossing over, I have been often told of remorse from the deceased of how they wished they made things clearer when they were alive.

Another time my husband and I went to a wake of a good friend of his. The deceased was an avid motorcycle rider who had a Harley. He and my husband were very close and my husband would repair his bike and they would ride together. So it was only fitting that his family brought his bike and parked it outside the funeral home for all to see with his helmet hanging from the handle bar. There was a boy about seven or eight years old touching the bike and you can rest assured that my husband’s friend did NOT like it. He started to scream at him and the energy was so strong that the little boy not only stopped touching the bike, but ran away as well.

The advice I have for all who loses a loved one is, whatever you want to say you should say it because they are truly there and they see and hear everything. So you can rest assured carrying out your loved ones wishes is not only important to them but also will help bring you the peace you so need as well.

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When it comes to grieving loved ones, positive thinking can be powerful indeed. When a client comes to see me, and they want to connect to a loved one who has passed, I find they are most focused on the trauma, or disbelief of the loved one’s passing. They focus on the pain they feel, or the vision they keep seeing of them as they lay. When a loved one comes to me while in session, they do have messages, and almost always, the loved one does not want my client to feel sad, or focus on how they passed, but wants them to remember the impact they had, and have those good memories.

Your emotions do control your thoughts, what you are feeling controls your actions. I inform my clients you need to stop spending all your time trying to figure out why this happened, but, to trust that it was his, or her time. Some things are not always meant for us to know the answers to, or understand. You just have to trust, and leave it to a higher power. You need to focus not on the tragedy, but on the life that was spent together.

Don’t let something painful be the focal point of your memories. When you relive the pain every day, you refuse to heal.  When you dwell on the painful experiences in your past, you become stuck in the past, and that makes it impossible to move forward.

The power of your positive thinking is very strong, and always the message is clear. When your loved ones come through, they are happy and at peace, seeing everything that’s going on, and yes, they are always with you. Always!

So the question I propose to you is: Do you want to focus on the day your loved one passed, or choose to remember how they lived?

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What is the journey of the soul after leaving here and crossing over? I am often asked, “What happens to people’s souls when they have behaved badly here on earth?” It depends on what each of us is here to learn. We all have our particular life’s mission, so when we have parents or members of our family that don’t treat us well, know that we signed up for this mission. As the old saying goes, “We can’t pick our family.”  Guess again. We do.

The big question is why? One reason is to give that parent or child a chance for self-growth. To step up to the plate or for us to experience what it’s like to be mistreated. The journey of the soul requires experiencing full circle every feeling and what that feels like for our soul. When I’m doing a reading, people’s loved ones come through, and for some their message is truly one of remorse and feeling so sorry for the pain they have caused. There is no pay back on the other side, but a chance to do it again, full throttle and to fully understand. I often say God gets a bad rap. He is not in the habit of punishing us, but to give our souls as many chances as one needs to improve our souls in each lifetime. It’s to learn and be as close to being God-like as possible.

In the end the soul’s mission, the true journey of the soul is always about love and kindness. After crossing over, the first thing we will learn is to experience every feeling– good or bad– what we had done to others on earth, to experience what we have done to them. To truly experience all of the pain and joy we have caused, to understand fully the serious wrongs they had bestowed to someone on earth.  Once that is understood we have peace, love, and forgiveness. There is so more anger; here we carry so much grudge, anger and discomfort.

Upon crossing over, it’s all about love, peace and true understanding. Here we carry our suitcase and it’s filled and overfilled with heavy baggage, of horrible emotions, anxieties, guilt, sadness and regret. We carry this around our whole life. What I try to tell my clients is it’s time to unpack. Once we cross over, our souls not only see but feel the tranquil calm of divine peace and love. There is no more baggage on the other side; there is only tranquil peace!

It’s not the task that’s given, but how you handle the task.

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